A competition so silly, they probably won't allow us to do it again. We're currently accepting applicants for our gladiator jousting tournament at Awakening Festival. If you're already planning to come to Awaking Festival, you're welcome to join out tournament. Email us your kitchen appliance alias and catch-phrase, and we'll pair you with an appropriate appliance. Don't worry, it's not real jousting...at least that's what we were told. The list of current competitors can be found below.
Roster list for the Last Annual Awakening Fest Kitchen Appliance Gladiator Jousting Tournament of Champions
Tiffany aka "Spatula" - I'm gonna spatulate you.
Neal aka "Cuisinart" - Prepare to be processed.
Debra aka "Dishwasher DJ" - I'll wash the competition away.
Gary aka "Waffle Iron" - Ready to kick cake bunt.
Grace aka "Blender" - Guaranteed to spin you around.
George aka "Oven" - Can you feel the heat?
Dan aka "Freezer" - Oh...that's cold!
Cheryl aka "Coffee Grinder" - Wake up and small the coffee. I'm reminding you that when life grind you down, God can fill your cup.
Melanie aka "Garlic Press" - I will crush you into little cloves.
Tommy aka "Mini Spatula" - Don't flip out!
Caprice aka "Zester" - I will steal your zest for life!
Gavin aka "Juicer" - I will squeeze the pulp out of you.
William aka "Gas Fired Oven" - I'm gonna cook your goose.
Diane aka "The Range" - Too hot to handle.
Joy aka "Cast Iron Skillet" - Though the rust of battle may come upon me,
I will wash it away with the water of the spirit,
rub in the oil of healing and thus defeat you...or just smack you upside the head.
Monica aka "Magic Bullet" - Speed Racer!
Adonijah aka "Teakettle" - I'm gonna make you scream!
Angela aka "Egg Timer" - Your time's running out.
Bob aka "Sponge" Bob - I am here to clean up!
